Behind the Back Fence

When the Feds were haggling over health care reform, why didnt somebody suggest reforming the Social Security death benefit. Two hundred and fifty five dollars would buy a funeral when they started. As I remember my earlier experience they would pay that to whoever paid the bill. Of course, the problem was they could not pay the bill without the 255 dollars. Nowadays they could have tossed in another 10 or 13 billion dollars and we could afford to bury all of the folks that some say will die because of health care reform.

While attending an anniversary reception recently I visited with two professionals in different fields. They commented about the fact that there was never anything useful in their respective trade magazines. They were joined by another in yet a different field who also agreed that trades seldom have any relevance. A friend who is a college/industrial trainer often says nothing is ever really new in the latest training discipline. Just a new name and a few tweeks to some training discipline of the past that reappears every ten years or a new generation. So what are trade publishers supposed to do other than stick their heads in the sand and continue merrily on their oblivious way? More grass roots contributing writers might help.

I was skimming the trades and read a good article by a funeral director who had visited many firms around the world looking at new ways to increase customer satisfaction. It was all true but the basic premise was essentially the same as an article that I wrote for a different industry trade magazine in 1991. Since good basic practices apply to nearly every company I rewrote the story and applied the same principles to funeral service. The funeral service version was published in American Funeral Director that same year.

Its nice to know some things do not change. The funeral directors current article included one of the same companies that I used as an example of the best in maintaining customer satisfaction and loyalty Nordstroms.

A colleague reported another sad case of the organ donor folks not being completely upfront with a family that was planning on a traditional open casket service. It was accomplished, but the family was misled about the complications that would be left for the embalmer and the amount of time required to return the body. This puts a lot of extra pressure on the funeral home staff. Please organ donor organizations be more honest with everyone. At your annual goodwill meetings you always tell us things are going to be better.

Has todays consumer become so geekafied and tweetterpatted that when the nursing home e-mails that dear old dad died, they will immediately pull up Funerals 1.5. What a shock! They now discover that there is now 3.0, but their computer is too old to support it.

Now it is off to the big box computer store and 1,500 dollars later and a half day for set up time, the consumer is ready to plan dads funeral. A few key strokes later and the plans fall into place for a great family mega-memorial tribute at dads favorite place in Hawaii. Ten days later the funeral consumer returns home, bedraggled and still wearing a wilted lei. Aside from the fact that the airline lost his golf clubs, funeral consumer is pleased with the familys mega-memorial service. Oops, the answering machine says, You have 23 new messages. This is the county morguewhen are you going to pick up your fathers body?.....

About the Author: Lowell Pugh has funeral director and embalmer licenses in Missouri and Texas and continues the operation of the 105-year-old family funeral home. He is publisher of The Dead Beat which began in 1999. He can be contacted at The Dead Beat address.